Re: Detectives are joking
I offer you a little story from life
Women
Coffee "on the phone"
Genre: comic - detective with a "corpse"
People’s sign: if the phone constantly rings, busy,
it means someone is drinking coffee!
Once upon a time there were, in one small village, two girls of Balzac age.
One was called Lena, the other Nadia. Both managed to be married, and now Lena had a son, and Nadia had a daughter (school children, independent).
Both girls were friends and worked as modest operators at a local gas station. Worked in shifts, worked for a day, 2 days at home. Lena took the shift from Nadia and therefore to talk, they did not have much opportunity. Both were passionate lovers of coffee (instant), they drank it not in cups, but in large mugs.
And since they rarely managed to meet in order to discuss the latest events and impressions occurring with each of them, and most importantly drink coffee together, they began to do all this “by telephone”.
It happened like this:
Nadia (from home): - Hello, is this a gas station? The bosses are in place?
Lena (at work): - The gas station is listening, and it’s you, yes, I’ll call you back later.
After a while
Lena: - Well, finally everyone has left, are we drinking coffee?
Nadia: - of course, I turn on the kettle
At this time, Lena at work also includes a kettle. They almost simultaneously at a distance pour the same amount of coffee into the mugs, pour boiling water, pour the same amount of sugar and almost simultaneously say to each other: - -
- Well, what is ready? (drink coffee and finally tell the latest news)
Lena: - well, come on, tell me how the shift went
I will explain that the work by the gas station operator is peculiar, just like in any work with clients there is both funny and sad. I remind you that the girls are not married, therefore they were constantly searching for “the men of their dreams”. And gas station customers are mostly men. Therefore, there was always something to talk and discuss, and these conversations could be delayed for 2-3 hours if no one and nothing distracted them. There were also joint viewing of series or programs (by phone) with the obligatory absorption of coffee. If nothing interesting happened during the shift, then some problems were discussed, for example, schools (where the children studied), parenting. In general, each of them knew about the second, her entire daily routine, that she ate, how much she got up, how many times she sneezed, who came and called, with a full description of the conversation and events.
And so, one day, during such coffee ceremonies
Nadia (at home): - Oh, count in my kitchen mouse
Lena: - where did she come from?
Nadia: - but how do I know, he sits in the middle of the kitchen, I sit on the stool with my feet, I don’t even throw anything at it, so the impudent person does not even move
Lena: - well, tell her shit, let her go
Nadia: - hey, mouse, shit, get out of here
The mouse is still sitting, went to the open door of the bath
Nadia: - fu, gone, my legs are shaking already
Lena: - you need to drink coffee, put the kettle
Nadia: - Yes, now, I’ll go bring a broom, suddenly she will show up
And now, for about two weeks, this mouse suddenly appeared or suddenly disappeared during coffee ceremonies.
It was always unexpected, there was no broom at hand, therefore its appearance and behavior were vigorously discussed, the mouse became the third in their company, so to speak, and now the conversation began like this
Lena (from work): - Well, how is your mouse?
Nadia: - I haven’t seen something yet, should I leave a broom in the kitchen to slap it or go to buy poison, otherwise I’ll figure it out in the dark on it ???
There was a discussion of how and how to kill the mouse.
In general, the mouse has become a full member of society.
And now, the fun begins. In addition to work and coffee ceremonies, Nadia also liked to be on the Internet, communicate there, write and receive letters. So to speak, spend time at the computer. And so she sits down at the computer, about to receive an important letter, and the “mouse” does not work, she has to remember forgotten skills how to work with one keyboard in order to download mail.
Somehow she did it all and in a bad mood calls Lena
Nadia: - hello, count up, my mouse died
Lena: - how did you die, did you kill her?
Nadia: - how could I kill her, she died herself
Lena: - yes — aaaa
Nadia: - tomorrow I’ll probably go to the city, I’ll buy a new one
There are no service stores in the village where the girls live.
Lena: - And what do you think, they are so simply sold in the city?
Nadia: - of course, there are many such stores
Lena: -Well, I don’t know, how will you arrive tomorrow, call, tell me
Nadia: - of course, I’ll call
This ended the conversation, Nadia set about searching for a car with whom to go to the city in the morning, and Lena digested everything she heard, completely bewildered.
The next day, Nadia arrived happy home, connected the "mouse" to the computer, did all the work, and satisfied calls Lena
Lena (at home): - Well, what did you buy?
Nadia: - well, yes, I took a large one, otherwise it was not very comfortable for my hand, it was gray, something else I didn’t like
Lena: - there are a lot of them, or something, a choice, and how, you drove her in the car?
Nadia: - how is it like, they are sold in boxes, packaged, but the choice is not very large
Lena: - aaaaaaa
The next day, Nadia went to work and in the morning Lena came to replace her.
Lena: - Well, how is your mouse?
Nadia: - what could be interesting with her?
Lena: - I don’t understand one thing, why do you first threaten to kill the mouse, then it dies itself and you go to the city to buy a new one!
Then Nadia bends over with laughter, she has tears flowing, she cannot utter a word, a few minutes later she stuttered to speak, Lena, who was completely at a loss,
- So you thought that I went to the city for a live mouse?
Lena: - Well, yes, but for what?
Nadia: - So, on my computer, the mouse died ...
And then they began to laugh so together that the chief came from the next office
I asked what is it?
Well, how to explain to him?
By the way, the boss tried for a long time to wean them from drinking coffee by phone, because the phone is working, and you can’t borrow it for a long time, but waved it. Just began to clarify
- I called yesterday, it was a long time, did you drink coffee on the phone?
- YES! The girls answered with one voice.
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